Exactly.AI
I’ve got to share some of these images that I’ve been making with Exactly.AI (Durer.AI)
I was able to train a model on my paintings using about 15 images + a language component (describing the art that I’m uploading for training).
Here are some generations from the first model I trained. It’s kind of fun to play with the prompts as a parameter in regard to generations from my own models. This is something you can do with current LLMs (Large Language Models), where the GANs (Generative Adversarial Networks) or CANs (Creative Adversarial Networks) have used no prompting.
I’ll show you more of why this could be fun, but first, this first set of images was prompted using words that were very close to the words that I input for training, making them closer to the actual style of what they were trained on.
This next set is what happens with the subject (above is abstract botanical), when the prompt changes from the original input.
Here, I switched out parts to add different subjects like palm trees, crows, gnarled trees, birch trees, coral, cacti, landscapes, skulls, and cats.
Artists can use this kind of thing as a study to see how one style might transfer to a different subject, or to explore different variations on their work before they set to it with paint.
One subject that this model is really good for is leaves - since so much of the work it was trained on was botanical abstraction. I loved how these came out. The prompts included much of my original text that described the style, material, and colors, plus the description of leaves falling and blowing in the wind.
I trained another model with some newer paintings, and here is what they look like:
Again, I kept the prompts close to the original prompt used when training, and that keeps the results looking like mine.
For me, using AI art tools contributes to a process of reflection, contemplation, and integration.
I’d be curious to hear how other artists who paint intuitively have found the process of training an AI model on one’s own work.
We have enough.
Expressions of Radical Hope: “We Have Enough”
Every week, I listen in to Midjourney Office Hours. I find so much of it fascinating, and I take notes to update my learning collective people to fill them in on changes, new features, and philosophy. There is a channel on the Midjourney Discord for the “daily theme” - you can choose to get notified when this theme changes or not, but it’s people in the same channel making art on the same topic. Often, this daily theme changes to reflect something discussed in office hours - like robot squid. I usually include some of these images with the update to the learning collective. This week it wasn’t really related, and I felt inspired by all the topics of discussion in general and made some abstract painting images. I try to prompt shapes, colors, styles, and materials I actually use.
I also used combinations of these ideas: new computer science, art history, biodiversity, responsibility, exploration, community, infinite compute power, radical hope, a beautiful future, post-scarcity, and monkeys looking for bananas in new places. (😂 It's always a good time!)
After making these images, I also used the /blend feature to really get something I was feeling. I took this image into Photoshop and used the neural filter Super-Zoom to upscale. Next up, I opened the upscaled image in Adobe Fresco to get painting - the live brushes are really lovely. If you’re a traditional artist working with AI, someone who has painted in Photoshop forever, or a new artist starting with AI-generated images and learning to paint digitally, definitely check it out.
I’m loving the tools that Midjourney has for making art, but also the community. So many acknowledgments of systemic issues and how we can have a better future. So much awareness that we have enough, for everyone. If I could see this community as a sea of people, I imagine many of them have these sparks of radical hope glowing within them… (Now there’s another thing for me to go prompt) 🖤✨
Considering Radical Hope
Radical Hope
Ethics in the Face of Cultural Devastation
by Jonathan Lear
Jonathan Lear considers the role of Radical Hope in the context of the Crow and the cultural devastation that the white man brought upon them. I read this to better understand how to clearly portray what radical hope is.
While this discusses how Radical Hope enabled the survival of the Crow, there are many parallels to our current existence.
When I say, "Radical Hope is a belief in some goodness we can not yet understand", I feel the need to tack on that it is also not "toxic positivity". Radical Hope does not forego acceptance but embraces it. Lear explains that Crow tribe member and eventual leader, Plenty Coups, understands that the way of life is coming to an end. He does not know what is beyond it but is able to commit to the idea that goodness exists for him and his people, beyond his current understanding. Through accepting the unknown, he is able to come up with creative ways to re-interpret cultural ideals. Lear is clear to note that this commitment on the part of Plenty Coups does not mean that there is divine or historical correctness here.
Lear brings forth the virtue of courage as a means through which one is able to make such a commitment to something they can not yet understand. The points coming from Aristotle:
1) a courageous person has a proper orientation toward what is shameful and what is fearful
2) courage aims towards what is fine
3) a courageous person must grasp the situation he or she is in and, through experience, exercise good judgement
4) courage paradigmatically involves the risk of serious loss and enduring certain pains
This part was particularly helpful to me in explaining why radical hope is NOT toxic positivity. The difference is this definition of courage. There is an awareness present in radical hope, that is willful ignorance in toxic positivity. "Bold acts that derive merely from optimism are not courageous".
To have radical hope, a person must know what is good and aim towards that. They must be able to accept the current circumstance, and act upon sound judgement. They must be able to be vulnerable.
Lear goes on to discuss this dream that Plenty Coups had, and how it was a manifestation of radical hope (thus courage) , and that "radical hope can not just be psychologically advantageous, but a legitimate response even to a world catastrophe". This brings me to think about how, given current world circumstances, we, if nothing else, have this resource of radical hope. We can be the "poets" of our time, using this resource to imagine new ways of being, of processing, of bringing ourselves into the future good.
In being a psychological resource, radical hope creates the capacity to respond well to reality. If we lack this resource, if we fall into despair, or toxic positivity/ wishful optimism. If we lack this capacity, we lack the flexibility required to travel through devastation.
Lear considers the cultural ego-ideal, which informs the way one strives to live a rewarding life. Without this ideal, it is hard to understand what one lives for. Loss of this ego-ideal is devastation in itself. Radical hope holds a space in which this ego-ideal can be in flux. What the Crow tribe went through did not allow them to pass on traditional ideals, which is why it became a necessary resource to hold the ideal of being in flux. This allowed the Crow to "endure a loss of concepts".
When one does not know how to live a good life, despair seems inevitable. The concepts for what should equal happiness are gone, so how would one even continue to strive for that or experience that state of being?
Our lives are full of changes, not so constantly large as total cultural devastation, but how might the idea of radical hope enable us to adapt to those changes? How might it give us necessary resources to address current cultural failings and envision new ways of being that are infinitely more "fine"? How can we be vulnerable to allow this process? How must we embrace our sense of yearning for the good, so that we are clear-eyed and mindful of the current reality?
I believe that ideas like defunding the police, effective climate crisis action, and giving land back to native peoples come from the space held by radical hope. These ideas are courageous, mindful, aware, and strive to create a new culturally informed ego-ideal.
When I ask how some people can see, and some people can't, I largely end up back on the fact that some people can not accept - the history, the truth of current circumstance, the shift of ego-ideal. They are still living in magical optimism space, where something Jesus-like (or Trump-like) will come and save them (their way of living and believing). There are alternately those who have chosen despair. They are also unable to see, because the space they exist in is another sort of extreme, where nothing matters. It is interesting to me that they create these spaces too, unwittingly, and how important mindfulness is to the concept of radical hope.
I’m going to continue my reading and writing about this concept, and I would love to hear your thoughts too.
“I love you, and I’m sorry”
OKAY. A lot has changed since my last post! It’s been a whirlwind and today is the first sort of day to myself, to just focus on my stuff, and I almost don’t know where to even start.
THE CHANGES - Vaccinations! Moved to GA! Quit my day job!
Whoa, right? That’s a lot in 3 months. Which is why my husband just kept repeating the phrase, “ I love you, and I’m sorry”, ha ha. The plans all started when he decided to “put out feelers” to see if there were any better options for him in another job. WELL - the response was immediate, and everything went really fast, and here we are!
My last day at my day job was Friday! So today is the first official day of work, just for myself!
21 for 2021
As if I needed another thing to want to do - I just discovered this: https://thepeoplesinauguration.org Which is rad, and of course it sounds like something I would totally love to facilitate within a women’s group. So maybe I will? I have a day-ish.
In the spirit of doing a ridiculous number of things - I couldn’t quite fit my 21 things for 2021 into one list, so I made two lists!
I’m going to borrow a page from a dear friend’s book and be a bit of a tease about this - I’m not sharing a few of my items this year until they’re crossed off!
First up - here’s my personal 2021 goal list of 21 things:
1) Get Vaccinated (I’m on the list!)
2) TOP SECRET INFO
3) ALSO NOT TELLING YET
4) walk more
5) write more (Started going through The Artist’s Way with my friend Jess = morning pages with accountability!)
6) organize my addresses
7) buy more art with my husband
8) get a great quality long necklace chain
9) learn about shipping options (this could go on my other list, but it didn’t)
10) use curable (bought it for the year, have done some meditation and writing exercises so far)
11) unsubscribe (I get too many emails, and it overwhelms me)
12) take my vitamins
13) stay hydrated (found DripDrop - tried it, it helps, and I ordered more!)
14) Protein (I’m supposed to eat as much protein as a young male athlete - and have it every 2-3 hours - it’s difficult to remember to get this into my body)
15) EMDR (continue weekly sessions)
16) Check up - check in with Dr. about Fibro-status/treatment/support (had my appt. last week. Update in 6 mos)
17) Get Eye Exam (figure out if Dr. is seeing people yet? RE: COVID)
18) Get new glasses!
19) Dance more - I’m so missing all the time with my family and our spontaneous dance parties.
20) have more mom/sister/friend/family dates
21) Plan something fun for our 40ths! (yes, the hubs and I both turn 40 this year - GASP!)
Artist 21 for 2021:
1) Write about my art
2) Update statements
3) Send a newsletter every month
4) Grow my email list (See Above!)
5) make a 2021 + beyond vision board (a physical one to put up where I can see it every day - it’s currently digital)
6) make a visual resonance vision board (a physical one to put up… it’s currently digital)
7) Do a digital portrait series (I have my first few people in mind, and have these divided up to do 1/month)
8) Learn more about using Adobe Fresco on my iPad
9) Learn more about using Adobe Illustrator on my iPad
10) Learn more about using Procreate on my iPad
11) Make stickers (sigils)
12) Make photographs
13) Explore digital collage
14) Use Pinterest to promote my art and interact
15) Get artist photos done (headshots and styled)
16) Participate in THRIVE
17) Participate in YAH Women In Art
18) Update my VIDA shop at least quarterly with new designs
19) Do projects with materials from Oh, Scrap!
20) Meet most of my quarterly goals
21) Collaborate
My word of the year this year is Resilient - and in that spirit, I’m choosing these things as part of my growth and flexibility. It’s been insightful to note my lists over the past few years, and my word/phrase of the year. I can see how I’ve progressed and how things have grown and changed. I often think about the practice of gratitude and our culture that teaches us to desire so much. There’s a quote somewhere about remembering, what you have today is what you wished for in the past. I find it worth remembering that, reflecting on what those things were, and remembering all that you have and have done… I’m driving again. I found community. I’ve dedicated myself to doing the work of healing. …I love goal setting when it’s from the heart and for the highest good. I love when my friends and family share their goals with me so I know how I can support them. I enjoy when we are vulnerable enough to share our dreams with each other, and support each other in achieving them, even the silly ones - especially the silly ones.
If you want to join me this year, I’d love to hear your goals!
Being sensitive, holding space, and radical hope.
For a long time, I would be disappointed by people for their actions. I couldn’t understand it and I always felt let down by their behavior, as incongruous to how I saw them. Not all that many years ago, I realized that this is because how I saw them was incongruous with how they actually were - and that my mistake is inherent in how I use what I see. How to put it? I’m sensitive. Not just in the way that got me made fun of growing up, but also in the way that I have access to other pieces of information that aren’t exactly within the “normal” range of experience. Some of these things are categorized as psychic and/or empathic abilities, like being able to actually feel what someone else is feeling, in my body. And all of this information can be really confusing and overwhelming - especially when it’s all tangled up with trauma and unhealthy dynamics. But back to what I came to understand about my experience of other people, I realized that I am able to tune in to who a person really is, and I experience this knowledge at a feeling level.
There are ways of knowing that are intuitive, and the more we learn to use them, the more we come to understand about ourselves, our relationships, and our world. I think that artists are in tune with these abilities in different ways. Learning that I have a strength when it comes to claircognizance (knowing) and clairsentience (feeling), has been very helpful to me. Now, when I meet people, I know that the sense I get of them has more to do with their greatest potential than the level they actually operate on. I’m able to stay out of situations where I, because of my empathy, obliger tendency, and familial relationship templates, would be blindsided and taken advantage of. I know more of a difference between who I am, what I’m feeling, and who someone else is. That might sound crazy, but if you’re able to pick up on all kinds of information and don’t know how to/ can’t process it, it can be VERY confusing.
To parse out all of this info that’s coming in, I needed to put boundaries in place. I needed to have help and support creating a practice. It has to remain in place this way for me to just feel semi-ok. Lately, it’s hard. I want to hit pause on everything and just paint and process. Just staying grounded and mindful is much of my self-care.
The idea of radical hope has been getting me through. It’s been so important to me at the core, and the more I contemplate, the more I realize that radical hope is at the very foundation of who I am. It is tied to the reason that I sense people’s potential state, not just the current one. It’s the reason that I can know, absolutely, in my bones that something is righteous. (Not that I am right, but that a concept has a righteous feeling, I think about it, and my body just knows). It’s like having a sense of direction, knowing which way is North. I’m just orientated to a different set of parameters that is intuitively defined, and the concept of radical hope is a compass.
Radical hope is essentially having hope in situations that have absolutely no hope. Radical hope is wise hope, not toxic positivity. It is a hope that doesn’t deny the reality of our suffering, but chooses to see it all, and take action.
Writings by Joan Halifax, Rebecca Solnit, and Jonathan Lear explore this subject further. I find the concept of radical hope to be in alignment with Catholic social justice teachings, and present in the punk rock community. It’s active. It’s defiant. It’s also very present in post traumatic growth, where there is space, often uncomfortable space, between what happened, what is, and what will be. It is in this space that we may act. This is what my work is all about. Holding space for the truth and the capacity to transform it. Radical hope.
What a great realization to have.
I have known that the work I do is about holding space - for people in portraits, in installation work of shrines and imitation relics. There is repetition of information, movement, shifting of forms. These constants have existed, and I can only see them now that I look backwards through time and media and a plethora of projects. I’ve focused on the beauty of an individual, seeing what makes them true. I’ve created experiences - literal spaces to be in, and prompted an ignition of radical hope in the face of systemic injustice. I’ve made bowls filled with intention and set them on fire. I’ve sought community through my work, connection to others to create a shift. I’ve tried time and time and time again to capture visually, something that I know in my bones, that I feel and experience, that is completely invisible and goes back to the concept of space. It is wild how filled with radical hope it always was, and how I lacked the descriptive words to say it. I have them now.
My work is about radical hope, and I want to share that with you.
Hold on.
I read somewhere that today’s date is Blursday the somethingith? That seems correct?! How are we all doing out there?
How am I? I am frustrated, angry, sad, furious, heartfelt and full of love, shut down, wound up, choked up, exhausted, strong, defiant, silent, screaming, full of hope and rage.
(But like, more so than normal)
I have been hanging onto words and paint and music. (Again, more so than normal) Aaaaaand Animal Crossing. That game is an absolute delight full of art, music, and silliness.
Also, the universe is sending me clear messages this week, and it’s weird in contrast, because everything else feels so foggy. There have been so many synchronicities happening that I’m starting to laugh out loud about it.
One of those messages I’ve received being, “It’s time for me to dig in.” So I’ve been thinking about the meaning of that, because my nature is typically to do exactly that. But it was presented to me in a way that meant maybe I’m not… Maybe I have this “skill” of being able to dig in, but maybe I’m not applying it correctly? Hmm. This feels as true as today being Blursday.
This feels like a call to a “this is it” moment of self-commitment and truth, all else be damned. What a weird moment of frightening clarity in this space at this time. I’m just going to hold on.
The #100DAYPROJECT
I’m participating in the #100DAYPROJECT this year!
For my project, I'm choosing to focus on words. It fits with a couple goals I have for the year, crafting a great artist statement, and sharing expressive content more frequently.
Also, I've always found typography enjoyable - from learning to hand letter and create type, to finding the perfect font to fit a project.
I believe that words have power. They have energy and can be used to create or destroy.
I think, because I love them so much, I often over-complicate my thoughts and end up not sharing my own words online. I know that if I want anyone to connect to or understand my work, I need to talk about it, so this is an exercise in sharing my perspective with words.
The power of words is enhanced by their form, just like all art, there are decisions to be made about shapes, sizes, colors, arrangement... it brings me joy to see a phrase perfectly illustrated to fit it's own energy.
I thought about keeping my words only to do with injustices, as this is something in me that has needed expression, but I wasn't sure if I can hold such a heavy focus while I feel so overwhelmed by what is happening with COVID-19. I might need much lighter words some of these days, so I decided to keep it open.
Some artists I'm influenced by who use words in their work:
Jenny Holzer
Barbara Kruger
Robert Montgomery
Here are a few images from my first week of the #100DAYPROJECT:
I’m sharing my project daily on my Instagram stories, and will post them all to a highlight on my Instagram: @jenpalmerart
(Exhale)
It’s been a month since I last wrote here - and oooh, boy, has a lot happened. We’re pretty much all on home confinement now, as the COVID-19 virus is everywhere. I haven’t had to change my routine a ton, because I already work from home for my virtual management job and at my home studio. I’ve been writing posts for my satellite artist - virtual residency over at You Are Here. I’ve eliminated external duties, and moved my appointments all online.
I’d already been feeling overwhelmed, with an increase in work at the management job, plus different tasks that took a lot more of my energy than normal. I’m doing the residency (which is good because otherwise, I’d be letting my own work subside for right now), and keeping up with appointments and meetings, but my bandwidth had been really low, and doing anything else just added more stress. I KNOW I wasn’t getting enough time to myself to recharge.
… and now this. I am not capable of handling unwanted emotional labor right now.
It is definitely a weird time for me. I’m worried about people, furious about the ruling party (as usual), and mentally exhausted. I can’t stand all the hateful rhetoric being spread about, and the issue that no one wants to take responsibility for anything. I want radical change on a good day. We NEED radical change on a good day…
Satellite Artist at You Are Here
I'm doing a virtual artist residency with You Are Here!
I started at the beginning of February, and will have regular updates about the work I'm doing on their website: Jen Palmer Satellite Artist Blog
This is a really neat opportunity for me, because of my health and all its demands and limitations. I wouldn't have the capacity to drive somewhere and work every day, so this Satellite Artist program is a great fit 📡🎨🖤
all SHE makes
Hey lovelies, check it out, I’m listed on all SHE makes! Excited to be featured among so many amazing women artists from all over the world!
See the entire directory here: www.allshemakes.org
Visual Language Exploration: Portrait Pink
If you find a photo of me, any time before I was like 12, I’m probably wearing mostly pink. I thought all little girls loved it, but apparently people actually remembered that I wore so much of it. Maybe it was my light blonde hair and pink hair accessories that went with my pink winter coat and my pink my little pony lunch box?
No matter, I was out of the pink phase for a very long time. I remember a few different color phases, like this pale frosty blue that went with shimmery makeup and lots of glitter. It reminded me of ice and magic and the sky. Or the bright yellow of my great grandma’s vintage sweaters phase. Oh, and black and I have such a relationship... We’ll dive into those depths another day, because as it is, I’m in love with pink all over again .
So this is where I’m starting the discussion on the exploration of my visual language - with pink.
Color theory was one of my favorite classes in art school, and then, when I was in graduate classes for art therapy, I got to study color a whole other way. While we all pretty much have favorite colors, or colors we don’t like, many people don’t give a lot of thought as to why. A funny thing is how parents are concerned when their kid likes black - but often times kids LOVE black because it’s bold and stands out. They’re not associating anything with it that their parents are.
There are universal associations to color, line, shape, etc., but there are also deeply personal ones, and our own languages are a web of both. It was incredibly interesting to me to look at these through the lens of an art therapist. I learned to see how color connects us as a whole, and defines us as individuals, helps us tell our story.
Here’s an interesting read on the history of pink - from how it switched from being traditionally a boys color to being associated with gayness because of labeling by the Nazi regime, and to being a calming or demeaning color used for control in prisons.
For me, I think I’ve reconnected to using the color pink so much in my work because of my associations with it as a color of sensitivity and vulnerability. It is a color connected to our bodies, scars, tissue, inner things. It is connected with my inner child as well, whom always wears pink, and with whom I am healing. As to whether or not pink is calming, it entirely depends on the shade and intensity. Portrait pink is calming for me, it’s deep enough that I find it grounding, connecting to my inner self within the world. It holds the warmth of bodies. It feels like breathing, slowly. It pairs well with a soft cream blanket, or my closet full of black. I think it connects me throughout my existence, grounding me in my experiences, a thread through time. Oh, and I also love it’s juxtaposition to red. I feel like it was a rule somewhere, that you weren’t to wear red and pink together. I guess it’s dangerous if you don’t know how to choose your reds and pinks? But there’s a boldness in that combination that establishes something solid. Let’s channel Molly Ringwald for a sec. You feeling it?
It makes perfect sense then that I’ve been painting so much with this in my color palette, because my work is so much about holding space and growth, which require vulnerability. The process requires acceptance and not judging what comes into the self and the work. It’s treated with a softness that says - this is just what is, and this is okay. I’m sitting across from a very visceral painting right now, where deep red womb-like shape drips with heaviness upon a field of pink. It acknowledges the heaviness, the bleeding, growth, pain, etc. all with acceptance. The field is soft, and it’s okay to be there.
I think we’re also having a cultural moment that is resonating with this color, as part of women’s rights advancements, and the collective energy of women coming forward, using their voices, and claiming space. Probably for a lot of the reasons I listed for my personal use of the color. There is a connection from the micro/within to the macro/external, and it’s color is portrait pink.
January What?!
Where did last month even go?
My dad used to tell me that time only went faster and faster as you got older. HE WAS RIGHT. Apparently year 38 doubles down?
Between illness and family things, I feel like I haven’t spent much time on my projects.
HOWEVER - I have gotten into the studio in little bits, submitted work to multiple opportunities, and taken lots of notes. I spent time at a home show for my day job, and found some artists there. We bought a piece from Katrina Vogel and hung it in the living room.
Speaking of hanging, I helped hang the Women’s Work show at You Are Here, which was a great experience, it had been a while since I’d hung an entire room full of art for an exhibition, and Phoebe Walczak at You Are Here was a delight to work with! The show was great!
I didn’t get to record the new podcast episode for the Dynamic Feminine yet, but I managed to work on more than a few things on my 20 for 2020 list:
We got a treadmill, so I’ve been walking more.
I’ve worked on getting 20 good rejections, so far they have either been accepted or I’ve not heard back yet. I’m feeling excited about the opportunities that this is bringing!
Ran a marketing campaign (towards growing my email list - it’s gotten me more scam emails so IDK)
Did preliminary research on multiple things on my list - reading, listening to podcasts, writing, observing, planning…
I’m also feeling pretty good about how I’ve handled the pop-up demands on my time and energy: like, family needs, or OH CRAP, I need something to wear this weekend and have to go shopping (I don’t have spoons for that!), or getting a new doctor this month and dealing with some urgent health things. I also started a personal Instagram because I’m missing my friends and family on my feed @jenpalmerart. So now, you can find my personal account (sure to be full of my animals and family) on Instagram @hey_jenny_wren. Keeping connected with people I love is the reason behind my wanting to get my addresses and birthdays in order, so this was a step in the same direction.
Curate is definitely the appropriate word for the year! What are you doing to embrace your passions, goals, or theme of the year?
How was your January? Let me know in the comments or send me a message <3
Women’s Work at You Are Here
I have a couple pieces featured in the Women’s Work exhibition at You Are Here - the opening was this past weekend, and the show will be up until the end of February. What an awesome group of women artists!
You can read the Trib write up here.
Local womxn artists, join the You Are Here Women In Art Group, we meet at the gallery, and have a private Facebook group.
2019 reflections & 2020 visions
For the past couple years, I’ve been playing along with Gretchen Rubin, Liz Craft, and the Happier Crowd when it comes to my new year planning. I love this time of year, when our energy is drawn inward and the mood is set , in this part of the world, for slowing down and reflecting on our lives, and figuring out what we want moving forward.
I also pick a word or phrase for the year - inspiration, or a general reminder of what I want, when it comes to things that aren’t on that list. I really needed to get good at setting boundaries, so it’s helped me figure out if I should say yes or say no to something - does it further my overall vision for my life? I think it’s a really powerful tool, which is why my word for 2020 is “curate”.
Last year, it was “embrace being multi-passionate”, which was all about me just being who I am, and having a variety of interests, from painting, to photography, music, social justice, podcasting, reading, beading, and playing Magic: the Gathering. One gain I got from this focus, was noticing how these seemingly different things overlap, and seeing my own patterns elevated through my interests and how I pursue them. Social justice and art - DUH, social justice and Magic: The Gathering? ABSOLUTELY! Through this lens, I got to see my strengths and really think about how each of these things brings more happiness into my life. I also got comfortable with the idea that I’m allowed to do this. So this year, I’m further embracing that empowerment with the word “curate”. Part of saying yes to all that stuff I love was saying no to other things. Which is ok, and I’m allowed to do that. WHOA! Apparently this struck me as vital, because here’s the definition of my word for 2020:
curate
noun
Chiefly British. a member of the clergy employed to assist a rector or vicar.
any ecclesiastic entrusted with the cure of souls, as a parish priest.
verb (used with object), cu·rat·ed, cu·rat·ing.
to take charge of (a museum) or organize (an art exhibit):to curate a photography show.
to pull together, sift through, and select for presentation, as music or website content
Let’s check this out…
person entrusted with the cure of souls - healing, caring for the health of, ridding of detrimental factors
taking charge
organizing
sift through and select
POWERFUL STUFF. I am in charge of the care of my soul. I have the duty to rid it of detrimental factors. I say what’s welcome, what stays, and what goes. Holy boundaries, Batman. (I’m super proud of myself for getting to this point, BTW!)
In 2019, my list of 19 things included a bunch of health goals, finance goals, and creative community related goals. There are a few things I haven’t completed, like organizing everyone’s birthdays and current addresses, and getting the storage space cleaned out to make my encaustic studio, but I did a lot of things this past year that I’m happy about because of that list - like finally participating in book club! I did hard things, like paying off a huge loan, and going to all my appointments (2-3 a week, usually). I visited a Buddhist center, became a THRIVE member, and found YAH Women in Art right after too! I looked at a lot of art! I also played a lot of Magic Arena (even though I only made it through Platinum one season), worked on my oracle project, started a podcast with my friend Jess, launched this website, and ordered that perfume I’ve wanted for the last decade. I looked at campers, got new brown boots, and tried RASA, (adaptogenic coffee alternative) - I love it! I still don’t have a photography project I’m passionate about, but I've pitched a few ideas for grants, and that’s a step. I might scale back that project so I could do it in some form? Maybe? It’s going on the 2020 list!
I’m still thinking over a few things for 2020 (I’ve got a day!), but here’s the list so far:
get 20 rejections
put photos on my website
save down-payment
explore digital painting and illustration more deeply
do block printing
walk 20 in 2020
write consistently
make postcards
do a photography project
podcast with Jess
have a really good artist statement
make new business cards
explore my visual language
plan some day trips (Serpent Mound, Polymath Park…)
find tiny earrings
collaborative art projects with Alicia & with Meghan (It’s happening, it’s on my list!)
organize addresses and birthdays
acquire white tortoiseshell glasses
clean out storage - set up encaustic studio
find a good framing solution
I quite enjoy the whole dreaming up of possibilities, don’t you? What are your plans for 2020? I encourage you to make a list and play along! It gives us a unique opportunity to recognize and support one another. Jess and I will be discussing our lists on the podcast, and checking in throughout the year on our progress - we’re both Obligers, can you tell?
OK folks, I love you! Well wishes for 2020!
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